Punch me

Fandom stocking. Again.

So I'm working my way through the tags on Fandom Stocking and suddenly I'm having a burst of productivity and have produced seven - count them - seven Vorkosigan snippets in less than seven days!  What on earth is going on!!!  I am assigning them to random people on the list (since there aren't many people I actually know on the Fandom Stocking this time around) on the general principle that it's better to give than to receive.  Woo hoo!
Punch me

Fandom stocking

Shameless plug, but thanks to the helpful advice from Philomytha, I actually DO have a "fandom stocking" this year!  If you feel like clicking on the link and leaving me something cute to read/look at/listen to come Christmas, I'll be very grateful.
Punch me

Well Phooey!

I just saw someone post about their fandom stocking being open (remember last year?  It's a groovy idea where people come together and write little bits for each other as christmas presents - or make vids or pics or other fannish stuff).  And it's moved to dreamwidth so I faffed about getting myself an open id so I could log on and join in... and I'm too late.  It's already closed to new stockings.  Well Phooey!


My great aunt was a whiz at baking. But she would always offer you a plate of cakes saying "I've made this, but it's not very good."

Her cakes were delicious, of course, but I don't think she ever believed it.

Sometimes with writing you just have to get over yourself and accept that you don't think something is very good. But offer it round anyway. People might like it.

And, yes, I know that's the recipe for an appalling slush pile and half the things on fanfic net, but my problem has always been walking on THAT side of the line. I can walk the OTHER side, where you go "it's not good enough yet" for ... well, years.

So I posted a piece of Vorkosigan fanfic on AO3 today. I made this, but it's not very good. But I've been fiddling with it for literally months, and I don't think it's going to get any better. It might be to your taste. It might not. Help yourself. But don't feel you have to, if you already ate.

(I also updated the Sherlock masterlist with a piece I wrote for the summer commfest.)

Sherlock Master list

Understanding.  Summary: abusive!Mycroft really is Sherlock's arch enemy
Five Minutes: Summary: John Watson is missing.
Tin Man: sequel to the abusive!Mycroft fic Understanding. Summary: there's a fine line between being annoying, and being annoying enough
Unnamed Comment Fic in which we learn of Dr Watson's double O past, and the identity of - Mummy!
Paint sequel to Five Minutes.  Special appearance by Graham Norton. 
Woodstock Mrs Hudson reminisces
Head Set in the "Five Minutes" 'verse.  There's, you know, a head.  In the fridge.
Meet the Calvers Summary: Naked.  Silk Sheets.  Hmmm... (Not nearly as interesting as that makes it sound, by the way!)  Never been happy with this one.
Unnamed Secret Santa fic: slash.  Warning for rape scenario and the appearance of partner betrayal.
A Bouquet of Barbed Wire  Bad guys want information from Sherlock. All John knows is, it hurts. And no, he won't run. Warnings Blood, broken bones, pain, some burnt bits. (This was also remixed by the lovely sprl1199 here)
Assassin You're a dead man.  Warnings: au, medical coma, possible claustrophobia/pyrophobia triggers
Malone A remix of brighteyed_jill 's story Desdemona
Conversation A Sherlockmas giftfic, as well as a sort of sequel to the Unnamed Comment Fic.  In which Mycroft and John have a kind of conversation, as do John and Sherlock.  Slashy but more sentimental than explicit.
And I also wrote a batch of snippets for the 2011 Fandom Stocking which I have posted as one entry here: there are three which are Sherlock-based: 
  1. For shinyjenni a Sherlock/Dr Who crossover.  Locum doctors with a moment to exchange war stories
  2. For meteorfire a Sherlock/Torchwood crossover, in which a stolen Tardis is gathering Heroes
  3. For dellessa, a Sherlock/Harry Potter crossover in which Nymphadora Tonks appears in the fireplace.
New in November 2012: Ships that Pass, a piece written for the SherlockBBC Summer 12 Commfest.  Summary: it's dangerous to attract the attention of a fledgling crimelord.

Scandal in Belgravia (spoilers)

I'm a bit conflicted.

As a Sherlock fan, I absolutely adored this episode.  It had everything.   #Sherlyinasheet, "shoot Dr Watson", "how many times did he fall out of the window?"  Plot.  Characters.  Action.  Wit.  Grace.  Benedict Cumberbatch Benedict Cumberbatch Benedict Cumberbatch.  And a riding crop.

As a fan, I say a big old SQUEE.

As a feminist...

...look, why can't there be one - just one - female character with some agency outside of her sexuality?

Irene Adler?  Yes.  She's Sherlock's equal... who makes her living as a dominatrix, who outwits Sherlock's attempts to read her by confronting him naked, who has to be rescued in the end.

Molly?  Unrequited cringeworthy fangirlishness that is almost literally unwatchable.

Mrs Hudson?  Dotty old lady who does "mummy in peril" and astonishes by having a second of unexpected competence.

Not-Anthea? Sex object wafted in front of John to enable Irene to abduct him.  Might as well be a carrot on a string in front of a cartoon donkey.

Jeanette the Boring Teacher: (John's girlfriend) existing purely as the punchline of a "Sherlock has no manners" joke.  Well, and a "neither has John".

And that's it.  

Where are the women who are people

Update: this in the Guardian blog, also identifies the original Adler's hallmarks as intelligence and agency. Quite.

Help me, Obi Wan!

I have promised to turn in a fic for the Sherlockmas Xmas exchange but I don't have a beta reader - can anyone help please????  It's due on 15th and it'll be, erm, finished by then.  No, really (!)

Seriously, it's currently about 1500 words and growing a bit.  I'm British, so it doesn't need a Brit-picker but just a general dust-down and nit-pick.  Anyone???  Pretty please?

Fanfic Master List

If you know me at all, you'll know I'm not good at the detail, completer/finisher kind of stuff. Nevertheless I'm going to have a go at putting all of my fanfic from various fandoms onto An Archive of Our Own, and as I do so it's my intention to list them here.

The fandoms in which I have been active are:

seaQuest - ah, my first fandom! I took all my seaQuest fanfic down on the death of Jonathan Brandis in 2003. In the unlikely event that (a) I can find the files again and (b) anyone still wants to read them, I'll consider archiving them.

Hercules - most of my Hercules fiction is still up and about in various places but I'll try and pull together the links and put them systematically into the AO3 archive over time.

The Sentinel: this is the fandom in which I was most active and I'll try and post things onto AO3 as I come across them. If you have a special favourite you want me to dig out, feel free to ask. The ones I've put up so far are:
Bugg This was, I think I'm right in saying, the first Sentinel fanfic I wrote so it's only fair to have it go up first.
Jim and Blair's Excellent Terminator Adventure Ah, this one was always a favourite child.  It's a sublimely cracky story which puts Jim and Blair in place of Bill and Ted in the Excellent Adventures universe, with added Terminators.  There will no doubt come a time when the last line will require annotation, and at that point I'll really know I'm old!
Cold War which I've always thought of as the quintessential Sheffield fanfic: Blair Sandburg, kidnapped four times in forty-eight hours, by three different sets of people.  And I've always resented the way no-one laughed at the moose.
Another Life I was really pleased the Wayback machine still had this one, because I couldn't find it in my files at all.
Junkho This is the prequel to Another Life.  There's a half-written Part 3 in my files too... if I could only remember how it was supposed to end....
Bagpipe: Darkfic.  Crossover with The X-Files.  When Alex Krychek meets Alex Barnes

Sherlock - this is where I currently do most of my writing, although because it's an LJ based fandom I'm known as "sheffsfic" rather than "Sheffield".  If you want Sherlock stories they're already on this site, but I'll archive them (she promised rashly) for the sake of completeness.  The only one there so far is
Assassin which is going to be the first of a series.  Honest.  Eventually.  Probably.  No, really.  Sigh.

Miscellaneous fandoms

I'm a bit of a crossover fiend, so you'll find odds and ends of other fandoms popping up here and there, and I'll try to be organised about listing them here.  Although I'm not entirely sure that, for example, Excellent Terminator Adventure really needs listing under Bill and Ted and Terminator as well as Sentinel but, hey, that's for the Future Archivists of Fandom (I envisage someone sitting in the Library of Congress in 2056 with OCD and an ancient set of computer disks of all shape and sizes - ah, remember disks! - and, maybe, a propellor beanie, trying to make sense of the cats cradle that is fandom)

But I have committed Vorkosigan fanfic here, in Stealth Ninja Cats: A Vorkosigan Snippet

If you're actually interested, you should probably bookmark this page because the intention is that I'll update it.  Watch this space.  But please note that the last time I was actually on top of my game as far as the internet goes I was posting on mailing lists and archiving on Geocities.  If you have any helpful suggestions (in Very Simple English.  Preferably with diagrams) I'm very happy to be educated, assisted or indeed reminded.  Bribery works, too!  Enjoy.